Run #1408 Hotel International 2000!

Keeping with the trend, I'll start with a joke, here we go:

Q: How many hash scribes does it take to write drivel about a bunch of w**kers every week?

A: More than 2 if the two are Solar Erection and Katanga Bbi

Yes, I know that we (read I) have been lost and while I'm not sure about Katanga, I have two great excuses: 1 - it gets truly exhausting writing about you bastards every week.  and 2 - I've been out of the country and haven't attended a hash since Joglo Bar.  I suppose I could've guessed what happened and written about that, and I likely would've been 97% right but maybe we'll try that route another time.

Katanga - I'm waiting for your clever excuse.

Monday's hash was at "Hotel International 2000" and honestly my favorite part of that name is the 2000 - like they want us to know they haven't remodelled or made any improvements for over a decade.  Have some forethought people!

The Hare was Itching Thighs and while she was quite mean with the number of (quite obvious) check backs she planned for us, she was quite polite, saying things like "Runners, Hashers down, PLEASE!"  I don't think I've ever heard such good manners from a hasher - it really caught me off guard.  But then all was back to normal when we arrived back at Hotel International 2000 and there was no water to be seen.  The walkers and FRBs had sucked the one case dry and the rest of us were left to wander around like whiny children, asking "WHERE IS THE WATER??? GIVE US WATER!"

Though Kiluvluv was offering us the option of drinking out of some kind of puddle that had accumulated in the yard.  Many may have opted for this even though it'd likely give them bilharzia of the stomach and ebola, simply because there was truly no other water in sight... besides the pool... and everyone knows that kids and some certain hashers pee in the pool, so that option was crossed off the list.

Anyway, the water eventually showed up and we eventually started the circle:

The consensus of the run was that there was no where near enough beer and either not enough of too many checkbacks and of course - too much water for hashers when they finished.

Announcements:

- Kaazi Run is this Saturday starting in Makindye at the ARA.  It costs 10,000/- and registration starts at 3:30 at the ARA.  There will be a bus from Kaazi back to the ARA following the run and a bus leaving Kaazi at 2:45 for those who want to park there.

- Some w**ker who fancies himself a bit of a Benedict Arnold got up and was offering an alternative Hash Bash...  For cheaper...  Yeah, I'm not sure either.

- The real Hash Bash will be held at Royal Suites on November 27th, the fee is 40,000/-  (Though if you're looking for something for around 25,000/- you can go to the Judas Hash Bash - though besides the price I'm not sure of any details)

- Gishenyi Run - register @Shop 47  the fee is $68 and transport will be 80,000/-

- MTN - They are still threatening to close registration... now they say it's Nov 7th...  We all know you'll still be able to register up to the week before but just in case they keep their word, you may want to think about registering.

- Next Monday's Hash will be held at a place called Magic Parking near Christ the King and La Bonita.  I can't help but wonder, what the hell is so magical about a parking lot?  We'll have to go and find out.  Usual crowd, usual time.

Newcomers
- Jan says he's from Kampala and that Long John Silver made him come but remaining quite mysterious, that's all he told us so I'll have to make up the rest.  Jan, pronounced "yan," is a muzungu from somewhere in Europe so my deductive skillz tell me that he is here working for a state agency or NGO.  Or Jan could be a mercenary.

Returnees
- Danny Boy has returned from China where he was getting his masters but if you ask me I'd say that he just had a major case of Yellow Fever, if you know what I mean.

Sinners
-Inflation didn't bother coming into the circle when returnees were called for
- Pamper and Masulo were talking all through the circle
- Conman was outed in a recent edition of some newspaper - but before you get your torches and pitchforks it was for being baker and not the lawyer we thought he was.
- Landlord was caught canoodling with young boys on the route, since Landlord himself had run off we had to go with a look-alike who told me his name and it sounded like Robert Mugabe, so that's what I'm writing, even though he didn't have a Hitler-esque mustache and he also didn't look like an ancient, Zimbabwean autocrat so I'm thinking it wasn't THAT Rober Mugabe.
- Two big-bellied men with matching t-shirts were both always on the phone so they were brought in but also made to "turn around" and show us those glorious, 8.5 month baby bumps.

Chatterbox
Pre-paid Sex ended up beating out Jackie and Thierry's Pussy and Nipples for Chatterbox for doing what hashers do - shooting the shit, gossiping, running their mouths, yeah, all that stuff.
Hashit
- Kwashiorkor was overheard shouting to Queenie as he ran by, "Don't worry Queenie, I still love you!"  This is a little sad because, as we all know, while Queenie has been known to go for ginger ladies, they usually have a much lighter complexion than Kwashiorkor.
- Alex was brought in simply because he's a muzungu and claims that he works in Kampala "once in a while."
- Monique who doesn't even know why she was there, was brought in for being a goody-goody.

When we were seconds from singing a down-down for Kwashiorkor as Hashit, the award was stolen by Pamper who prematurely threw a soft drink at Kwashiorkor.  Now a brief lesson for all hashers: doing anything prematurely isn't good - avoid it all costs, otherwise reap the consequences, as Pamper found out at Hotel International 2000!

On! On!

Solar Erection